I knew Cuban guy in Florida:

me: ''wassup friendo....."

he: ''why are you calling me 'my friend?''

me: ''because........''

he: ''always when I hear 'my friend' I run away."

me: ''why's that?''

he: ''because it never happened somebody would say 'my friend, here is US$100 for you!

And it always happened 'my friend, give me this, my friend give me that!''

Friends yes, strangers no.

But I am a very trusting person.

For example, when I pay the bill in my local bar, I just hand over my wallet and let the barmaid take whatever the bill is. I do that both sober or drunk.

To me its a test. I am testing myself. Do I practice what I preach? And not in a religious way.

I believe that all people are fundamentally honest. Dishonesty is something that is taught.

Another example, myself and a group of Chinese friends are into photography. We loan each other $2k lenses all the time. Its almost as if all our camera gear is a shared resource. One of the group has my Canon 24-70 at the moment, Next time I see her I will be borrowing her 16-35

this might be related to the poor multitasking that people have witnessed, like thoughtlessly abandoning your child to buy something in a shop.

it's not the first time i've heard that you can't rely on people to do things. icnif77 says you must keep repeating the request, but i just mentally prepare for the likelihood of things not getting done on time.

when someone asks my help and i agree (i won't say yes to every request, especially if it looks like they didn't try anything before asking me), it's fairly high on my priority list. it will get done within a day, and if not, it gets labeled urgent in my mind.

even my Chinese wife will listen to Chinese people speaking before listening to me. in this sense, the unreliable aspect may be a sign that we are low on people's priority list. we see requests as pleas for help and respond as we would to any Mayday - with haste. they see requests as an indulgence, and will give you the courtesy of their aid when they see fit, as long as nothing personal needs to be done.

the only requests i've gone China-style on are proofreading requests with vague compensation offers. similarly, requests for quick baidu searches may go unanswered because the person doesn't want to become your personal search engine - perhaps misjudging how often you plan on making requests.

Chinese person; "He is/you are my very bestest foreigner friend. We are best friends now. This is my very best friend. We are gooood friends."

Other Chinese to whom he speaks; "Wow! You are so strong and powerful and we all want to be you."

Me; "Steady on mate... Anyhow, what do you want this time? What's your name again?"

Chinese... non-Chinese...

The only person that you can rely on is yourself.